Tag Archives: Sports

The Torture of Indecision – To Skate or Not to Skate That is the Question

ImageIn the absence of my ability to make any kind of decision myself, I will leave it up to you dear readers to lead me out of my current ruffled mental state. What exactly is this kerfuffle about?

It’s about this. Every September I make my way twice a week with my speed skates  to the local rink to skate with my group.  But I didn’t go this year because Reub was sick and I wanted to spend time with my guy and because I was also taking classes.

The problem is now that I can skate I don’t seem to be able to get there. I pack my gear, bring it to work and then spend the day agonizing about whether I should go or not. And when I say agonize I mean agonize. It’s killing me. And I still haven’t gone which means another week of going through this. While others solve world problems my mind  is going in circles (small ones at that).

Snap Shot of the Circular Mind:

I’m going skating. I’m going skating FOR SURE.  It’ll make me feel great.

Na – you’ll get cold.

But think how much you’ll laugh .

No you won’t. Talking to all those people you haven’t seen for a while will be exhausting. All that exercise will make you tired.

But you love Agatha and the gang.

I dunno, my back is sore. And my office is so cold I have icicles hanging from my nose.

Forget it, you’ll warm up. You’ll be pulling layers off in seconds.

I can’t remember the last time I sharpened my skates, I might kill myself.

Remember what Jokelee said. Skip the negative stuff and take your brain straight to the reward. The high. She’s always right (older sisters almost always are – I sure wish younger sister would make note of this).

I know what I’ll do, I’ll get in the car and drive. If I end up at the arena then I’ll skate. If I don’t well then I’ll do Jillian Michaels and almost die from my 20 minute ridiculous work out.

Forget it.  You’ll see Diane there. You love Diane. She might even do up your skates for you.

Ah yes I know but I forgot my water bottle.

You can buy one there.

You forgot…I’m against the water bottle.

Well, admit it then, you’re nervous because you haven’t skated for awhile.

No that’s not it.  It’s the cold thing. The coldest office in the world, the one that makes your nails blue is killing all desire to skate around in circles at break neck speed.

Breakneck is a bit of an exaggeration don’t you think?

You’re right. It’s not exactly breakneck is it?

I know what I’ll do, I’ll ask the first person I see and see what they say.

They said go skating. But when they left they said, “Have a nice evening at home” as if they knew that I wouldn’t go.

So I’m not going.

And so on and so on and so on. And I still haven’t gone. And seriously. I’m not going to be happy until I go. I just need to get there. I’m not like this with everything but I’m definitely in a rut with this one. Someone just strap on my skates and get me some ice.

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I Am A Hockey Primate Afterall

I am known as a “bandwagon hockey fan” something any real hockey lover is required to disdain or at the very least frown heavily upon. We’re the ones who sail in when things are looking up and start loudly proclaiming our passion for the winning team. Frequently our enthusiasm can be mistaken for the real thing. So how does a ‘real fan’ distinguish themselves from the lunatic posturing of the bandwagon fan?

Well for one thing, the real fan actually wants to watch the game. Frequently the real fan can be found hiding alone somewhere in a quiet place where they can actually see and hear what’s going on. A wannabe such as myself just wants to jump up and down and pump their fist in the air preferably with a loud, rowdy group of people around. I desperately  want  to The Canucks to win, I just don’t need to know how and I need  to show my bandwagon love in a large open public space along with thousands of others.

Against all prevailing common sense, we waded into downtown Vancouver after the game started on Friday because I wanted to scream and yell, pump my fist in the air and dance around with billions of other people. Doing this in your living room in front of your TV doesn’t have the same level of emotional resonance as being able to slap people’s hands after a goal. Why is it that people like to gather in public places with complete strangers for these kinds of things and do things that appears not unlike an instinctive kind of behaviour our primate cousins might do.  So not only am I an unabashed bandwagon hockey fan, but I’m a true hockey primate as well.

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