In the absence of my ability to make any kind of decision myself, I will leave it up to you dear readers to lead me out of my current ruffled mental state. What exactly is this kerfuffle about?
It’s about this. Every September I make my way twice a week with my speed skates to the local rink to skate with my group. But I didn’t go this year because Reub was sick and I wanted to spend time with my guy and because I was also taking classes.
The problem is now that I can skate I don’t seem to be able to get there. I pack my gear, bring it to work and then spend the day agonizing about whether I should go or not. And when I say agonize I mean agonize. It’s killing me. And I still haven’t gone which means another week of going through this. While others solve world problems my mind is going in circles (small ones at that).
Snap Shot of the Circular Mind:
I’m going skating. I’m going skating FOR SURE. It’ll make me feel great.
Na – you’ll get cold.
But think how much you’ll laugh .
No you won’t. Talking to all those people you haven’t seen for a while will be exhausting. All that exercise will make you tired.
But you love Agatha and the gang.
I dunno, my back is sore. And my office is so cold I have icicles hanging from my nose.
Forget it, you’ll warm up. You’ll be pulling layers off in seconds.
I can’t remember the last time I sharpened my skates, I might kill myself.
Remember what Jokelee said. Skip the negative stuff and take your brain straight to the reward. The high. She’s always right (older sisters almost always are – I sure wish younger sister would make note of this).
I know what I’ll do, I’ll get in the car and drive. If I end up at the arena then I’ll skate. If I don’t well then I’ll do Jillian Michaels and almost die from my 20 minute ridiculous work out.
Forget it. You’ll see Diane there. You love Diane. She might even do up your skates for you.
Ah yes I know but I forgot my water bottle.
You can buy one there.
You forgot…I’m against the water bottle.
Well, admit it then, you’re nervous because you haven’t skated for awhile.
No that’s not it. It’s the cold thing. The coldest office in the world, the one that makes your nails blue is killing all desire to skate around in circles at break neck speed.
Breakneck is a bit of an exaggeration don’t you think?
You’re right. It’s not exactly breakneck is it?
I know what I’ll do, I’ll ask the first person I see and see what they say.
They said go skating. But when they left they said, “Have a nice evening at home” as if they knew that I wouldn’t go.
So I’m not going.
And so on and so on and so on. And I still haven’t gone. And seriously. I’m not going to be happy until I go. I just need to get there. I’m not like this with everything but I’m definitely in a rut with this one. Someone just strap on my skates and get me some ice.