Tessa: For a long time now my brother John and I have lived apart. I moved to Vancouver ages ago and even though he and his wife Alison lived here for awhile they chose to go back to Ontario.
Growing up my brother and I had our fair share of fights, and as adults we’ve also had our share of fights but we have always been best friends.
Even though I’ve lived in BC for almost thirty years we’ve managed to maintain a great phone relationship. We usually chat at least once a week, sometimes more and sometimes a little less. We often talk about his kids, or work or what’s going on with either of us but we often are just plain silly. Just as Batman completes the Joker, my brother is my other truly silly half. We laugh alot.
Sometimes I can’t wait to tell him some story that I know will make him roar and I hope he’ll pass it on to his wife Alison.
So when John and Alison decided to go to Peru for three weeks to celebrate their 25th anniversary, I didn’t realize how much I would miss him. My mom called one night to say that Johnny had called and that she had burst into tears when she heard him on the line. “I miss him.” she said. ” He visits me almost every night.”
My brother would never admit that he visits my mom because she needs visiting, he’d say he’s stopping by to have a cocktail with her but I think he’s stopping by because she likes him and needs him to visit.
The thing about my brother is this. He wasn’t raised by a dad who was that great. And my mom was a bit crazy too. Even though he was raised by my sometimes violent dad who was more often than not a jerk, he has grown up to be the kind of guy who decided to break that cycle. He is a great dad, a good husband, a great son and good brother. And he’s wickedly silly and funny.
People like my brother give me hope that you can make your life better than you were taught it could be. That’s why I was so damn happy when he and his wife and son came back safely from Peru and we could resume our regular chats.