Conversations with My Mother: Ploop, Ploop Ploop, and Ploop Ploop Ploop

Ring Ring:

Tessa: Hi Mom, How are you?

Rosie: Good. I was just going ploop ploop.

Tessa: Nice. So it’s all working down there.

Rosie: Well. No Ploop Ploop Ploops like the old days but ploop ploop twice a day is a pretty good day.

Tessa: :You still taking those hemp seeds and do they help?

Rosie: No,  I go to the bakery at Loblaws and get this delicious new bread. It has little seeds in it. The baker tells me he gets up at 3:00 in the morning to bake it. He can’t bake enough of it. Everyone loves it. I just got a notice that I have to re-do my driving test.

Tessa: Oh. How do you feel about it?

Rosie: What am I going to do? I have to do it. I have a book I’m studying.

Tessa: That’s good. Is it helping?

Rosie: It puts me to sleep. I’ve been studying for a week and I’m still not done. Last time I saw some old lady, maybe she was 95, she was writing the test with the book in her lap. Can you believe that?

Tessa: I find that hard to believe.

Rosie: It’s true. 95 with the book in her lap. AND SHE PASSED.Aggie isn’t doing her test and she’s going to drive without it.

Tessa: I know mom, you’ve told me that ten times. That’s not something to admire.

Rosie: I know but still. At our age what the hell. My appetite is good Tessie so it can’t be all bad. Wooooooooowwweeee. You have no snow. What are you going to do for the Olympics? I feel so sad. Skiing on straw. How’s work?

Tessa: It’s been really busy. A little stressful.

Rosie: You’ve never handled stress well. Makes you all red in the face like when you run. My god. You look like a fat red balloon. Why do something that’s going to kill you?.  I have to go. I feel a ploop. I better go work at it.

Tessa: Yeah, thanks for that mom. Talk to you tomorrow.


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