Conversations with My Mother: We get naughtier as we get older

Tessa: Hi mom, where’ve you been?

Rosie: I was at Tante Aggie’s for lunch.

Tessa: That’s nice. How is she doing?

Rosie: She’s really upset.

Tessa: Why?

Rosie: She didn’t pass her driver’s licence.

Tessa: Oh, that’s awful

Rosie: I say big deal.

Tessa: Mother.

Rosie: I told her to drive her car anyways.

Tessa: MOM.

Rosie: When I go and I fail, I’m doing the same thing.

Tessa: No you’re not.

Rosie: Yes, I am and nobody will know. I won’t tell anybody. Besides I only do little distances to the mall and back. Why not?

Tessa: Because  you could kill somebody or yourself.

Rosie: I’m almost dead anyways.

Tessa: I’m not talking about you.

Rosie:Anyways. Did you see Larry King with Jermaine. Ohmigod. Those children are so beautiful.

Tessa: Yeah, they’re pretty nice looking.

Rosie: They look just like Michael.

Tessa: No they don’t. They look like their mother.

Rosie: That horrible beast. You see her? Crooked nose and long stringy hair. She’s awful.

Tessa: I don’t think she’s that awful.

Rosie: She sold her children for a million dollars.

Tessa: Eight million.

Rosie: Eight million? Wow. [pause] I’d sell all of you for eight million.

Tessa: Me too?

Rosie: Yes. [pause]  We get naughtier as we get older.

Tessa: Not we. You. You are naughty. And it’s not just as you get older. You just are this way.

Rosie: I know. BYE!!!!